Long-standing and indeed long-falling-down members of the Dynamostaropremium AFC set-up will know that referee Jorge Satantango has done an excellent job keeping our pitches free of nastiness for several seasons. For a trial period, however, this excellent man will now be assisted by the Noel Edmunds Deal or No Deal system. 
This wonderful device comes in a flat-pack box and is self-assembly. No tools needed. Once assembled the device features two team captains with an encyclopedic knowledge of the customised Dynamo rules (including ‘sneaky D’). 
The system enables these captains to vote yes or no against claims for high ball, free-kick etc. either if play is stopped or someone is making a hullabaloo about their claim. It should help avoid unilateral decisions on fouls etc.
which often happen when players simply do want not to get involved in what might end up an unnecessary argument about what is in the end a bit of fun, In the event of a Deal/No Deal draw between the ‘captains’, the representative of referee Jorge Satantango on earth (a third official) will have the casting vote. 
The wonder of the device is that no discussion takes place, just the ‘Deal’, ‘No Deal’. Another feature of this amazing system of justice on the field of play is that players should not, in theory, end up arguing with each other about foul or no foul, high ball or not, and getting stressed about it..The system is compatible with the advantage for high balls rule.
The set features gold lamé armbands, frequent flyer points accumulation counters, beards, and specially designed, FIFA-approved in-ear phones.
